Start of Something New

Dear Readers,

I'm going to do this blog in letter form. I think it looks pretty cool, no? Anyway, if you haven't already read the About Me section, I am its_only_life, or you can call me by my real name, also stated in the About Me section. You can call me whatever you want (as long as it's not negative or degrading of course).

I started this blog because I recently decided to get help for my eating disorder. Just yesterday I called the counseling center at my school for an appointment actually! I want to write about how I'm recovering, if I ever recover, and what it's like. I suppose I should explain what I have.

I have bulimia nervosa. Basically, I will purposely throw up my food. I first started this when I was a sophomore in high school. My mother made a comment about something I was eating, and it made me feel so bad that I threw it up. It scared me a little, so I didn't throw up again until two years later. I was a senior in high school when I tried it again. It was a bit scary, but I did it anyway. I didn't do it often. It wasn't until I entered my freshman year in college that I did it at least once a week. Within the past few months, I would throw up around two to three times a week. I would only throw up if I felt I ate too much of something "bad." I wouldn't say that I'm a severe case just because I don't throw up regularly, but I know that it's a problem. I discovered it was a problem when I started to get headaches after I threw up and I felt very dizzy. My voice became slightly hoarse as well. The physical reasons are just one portion of why I decided to get help. I also decided to get help because of something my best friend told me. He said that if something bad happened to me and he didn't say anything about it, he would feel like a horrible person and would blame himself. I love my best friend to death and I would never want to put him in that situation. I also wouldn't want to put my family in that situation. They're worried about me enough as it is with the stress of school.

So that's basically the whole story! I will try to post as often as possible to update everybody reading. My purpose is to have other people understand what I'm going through, and if you're going through the same thing, hopefully encourage you to get some sort of help. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask! I'm open to talking about it. Thank you and happy blogging!

Sincerely,

its_only_life